Sarah says: I'm drink one of my favorite little bottles of Pinot Grigo again. Nothing new to report. It's still yummy and convenient! I watched this movie last night - Finding a Family. Here's the Synopsis online: After his mother becomes incapacitated, teen Alex (Jared Abrahamson) must navigate a series of foster homes in order to put together a family that will help him achieve his goal of attending Harvard.
I found myself shamelessly crying through half of this movie. A movie that brings out emotion like that needs to be discussed. I'm guessing most people don't even know about this movie. I'm pretty certain it was made for TV (based on the awkward pauses that were obviously made for commercial breaks, the fact that there are no big stars in it, and the fact that it's not rated). I am infamous for putting random movies on our Q (I use that feature "if you liked this movie, you might also like this one too" all the time. I generally add movies without even reading about them. I figure, we pay the same amount of money no matter what, so it's not like it costs me to add these things. Some of them are a waste of a few hours of my life, but sometimes I stumble upon gems like this one, and it makes it all worth it.
Basically, this boy, is crazy close with his mom, who is crazy smart. She has received her PhD from Harvard, he's 10 when he promises her he's going to do the same. Then she gets in a car accident, has a head injury, and is left suffering from bi-polar disorder, and she suddenly cannot adequately care for him. He spends the next years of his life bouncing around through foster homes and watching her life spiral up and down. He's torn between loving her and leaving her. Throughout it all, he manages to maintain a 4.0 and keeps working towards the Harvard goal (something that is basically unheard of with foster kids). The movie is fairly predictable, sad and heartwarming all at the same time. Oh yeah, and it's a true story.
Maybe it's the mere thought of not being able to care for my son (or either of my kids for that matter), but I cannot imagine what that poor Mom must have suffered with. Even though many of her troubles after the accident are brought upon herself (through her illness - I'm not blaming her!), but having your kid taken away from you, this has to absolutely be the worst thing to ever have to go through. To have the state tell you that you are an un-fit parent, it's unimaginable. And this poor kid, and he wants is to be loved by his Mom. And he tries so freaking hard to please her, and in return gets so much disappointment. Grab so tissues folks, it's sad.
It makes me want to search out a kid that needs a family and show him real love. I've said before that I would LOVE to be a foster parent. Not for babies, but for kids. Here's the thing... I would have a 3rd baby, but Jon is absolutely dead set against it. And, really, I'm ok with it, babies really aren't that fun. They can be cute to look at for awhile, but overall, they aren't so great. You can feed them, burp them, change them, sing to them, all that over and over, and they still end up just crying all the time. They don't really start to do fun stuff until they are 6 months or so. But, even at that age, they are so much work... if I could skip the whole baby stage and just get to kid age - that would be even better. No diapers, no bottles, no heavy carriers - just give me my 3rd kid, already walking, already potty trained, and already sleeping through the night. I'd like him/her to be able to tie their shoes, zip their coat, pour their own milk, and speak in complete sentences. Yup - I'd like a 3rd kid, not a 3rd baby. So, this is why fostering would be perfect!
Jon and I have talked about it before - so this post shouldn't be coming as a surprise to him (I think!). A few years ago, I convinced myself that now was not the time for us to look into fostering. We already have two pretty young kids who need our attention, it wouldn't be fair to them. And, with our opposite work schedules, it would just be really hard. But, I thought, maybe in 5 years or so we'll talk about it again. Well, we're creeping up on that 5 year mark - and it's beginning to look even less likely that it will happen. We're moving - to a much smaller home. It would have been tight to fit another kid into our house, but it will be impossible and unfair to everyone involved to try to squeeze another kid into the apartment we are going to be moving to. Sigh... maybe that's half the reason I cried through this movie. It just reminded me how much I want to help kids like this boy, but I just won't be able to.
All I can do now, it hope that eventually the timing will be right, and it can happen. Until then, I'll have to keep pouring all my excess love into my kids hearts, and drinking wine when it gets stressful.
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