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| That bottle is a lot more empty now than it was in this pic! |
The majority of the time, I'm drinking wine because I want to learn more about what makes wine so popular. My goal is to try as many different brands and flavors to determine what I really like and don't like. I also want to figure out what it means when someone says a wine has hints of oak (I've never thought wine tasted like a tree!). I want to eventually be able to talk about wine with some sort of knowledge and confidence, and even possibly be able to recommend a good wine, gasp! But I probably need to drink more expensive wine for that day to happen.
That's my reason for the majority of the time. The other time, I just need a drink. Today is one of those days. It was just a stress filled day. Nothing outrageous happened, it's just that no one in our family was in a good mood today, and it's taken a toll on me.
For two days the kids have been cooped up in the house, yesterday because of the rain, and today because of the turkey (more on that tomorrow!), so they were crabby. They were whining, fighting with each other, not agreeing on anything, and not listening to me or Jon. Nothing gets my blood boiling like my 5 year old ignoring me! He knows how to listen and follow rules, and it makes me crazy when he just doesn't. I can forgive a moment here and there, but for two days straight they both have been acting out, and it is getting to me.
I haven't gone running in about a week. I have no good reason. It's a combination of our schedules not really working out, the weather not being the greatest, me being slightly more tired than normal, and let's be honest, me just not making it a priority. I know that it gives me the time I need to clear my head and let go of my frustrations, yet I didn't push myself to get out there, so I'm cranky because of it.
I'm stressing about the future. Trying to guess what might or might not happen in the next few months is impossible, and it's making me crazy. I'm a planner, I like to know what is going to happen. I thought we had a plan, but now we are starting to look at other places to live again, and thus different schools. I'm so nervous that I'm going to make the wrong decision about my kids schooling and end up regretting it forever. Buying our house was such a giant mistake, and we are getting this one time chance to get out of it. I'm terrified of making a giant mistake again, but we won't have the ability to change it again. What if I choose wrong? We've wasted so much money already, we don't have much more to waste. What if we run out?
Jon and I have been tense towards each other. We are seriously such opposites, sometimes we make it work so well and find that lovely balance, but other times we just can't stand each other. Now is one of those other times. Don't get me wrong, I love him. A lot. But sometimes we just hate each other too.
I've been having some issues with my car, I've had to change the blinker light-bulb 3 times in the past 3 months. The 3rd time around I started getting suspicious that it was more than just a bad light-bulb. 5 hours and $450 later today, I finally have it working again. That was not a part of my plan for the day!
It's the combination of all these little things that have added up and made me one big stress ball grouch. So, tonight I'm not drinking to analyze what I do or do not like about a wine. I'm not drinking to open up my creative side, so I can write some witty blog. Tonight I'm drinking to relax, to forget, to de-stress. Is it healthy, probably not. But sometimes it's necessary.
I almost bought 2 pairs of shoes, but I stopped myself. So, for now, I'm on my second glass of wine. I have my alarm set for tomorrow morning, I have the coffee already in the brewer, and the running gear all set out. I'm getting out there tomorrow. Any other suggestions to take the edge off?
I drank that exact wine tonight as well!
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